04 July 2010

The F.Scott Fitzgerald of Beach Writing

A  fellow claiming to be a writer from Traveller's Rest, writing a book called Drip, Drip, Dump, a children's game like Duck, Duck, Goose interrupts Buff & Maggie, while they swoon on the red and white picnic blanket at Folly.  He said, "I'm about to submit it, and I need some pictures of kids on the beach.  Can I take some of your kids?"

the scene the man from Traveler's Rest intruded on

Buff and Maggie, stared with a Xanax glassy gaze at the gray haired man in a Loggerhead t-shirt.

"They're not my kids," says Buff.

"Okay, then do you mind if I take a picture of the strange kids that are not yours?" the man's voice sings in a drawl with a lilt.

"John?"  beckons Buff.

From a few feet in front of him, lounging in our red beach chairs with the surf at our feet, John and I turn to look.

the intent look of please don't interrupt my reading

The bizarre leathery man, while kneeling next to Buff and Maggie on the checkered blanket, speaks up,  "I know it sounds crazy as hell, but do you mind if I take some pictures of your kids for my book?"

Silence, even the waves stopped crashing.  For a full second, absolutely no one on the beach made a sound.

"Yes it does sound crazy as hell, and no, I don't think we are going to promote them that way."  I state with an annoyed definitiveness, like someone just interrupted me while I was reading Let the Great World Spin, or told  me a stupid joke, and I wasn't interested.

I turned and looked at John and said, "Does anyone on this beach really believe we are Buff & Maggie's parents?"  I continued, "Did Buff and Maggie need help answering that?  Would anyone really ever say yes to him? Did they need us to bail them out?"

After he walked away, we turned back to Buff and Maggie, confused.  Maggie explained the concept of the game to me.  It was only then that I realized he was asking about my children.

Later, John asked me if I googled the guys book.  Buff said, "how funny would it be if this guy ended up being the F. Scott Fitzgerald of beach writing?  The kids featured in his book get their own reality show and the game becomes the next corn hole.  And you are all like, we're not into that kind of self promotion."

He continued to warp my perception by saying, "The really funny thing is I had already told him yes."

I googled drip drip dump and the first hit was Sick and Twisted games.

Drip, Drip, Dump

No comments:

Post a Comment